Dear Husbands Out There,
This one’s for you.
I have been lucky enough to be blessed with a pretty great guy, but he’s human – just like the rest of you. With holidays around the corner, I thought it would be a good reminder to appreciate your woman. Not just a “Yay, for you!” or “Thanks, honey.”
But, I thought I’d delve a little further into what we mean when we say (loudly) You just don’t get it!!
Cross ‘It’ Off The List
Maybe she’s asked you to fix that door lock, change those dining room lightbulbs or throw out that box in the basement. Whatever was on that to-do list, right now, take a moment and do even just one, without her asking you again. Show her despite all these years, you still pay attention to her and her needs. She’ll be both shocked and in awe of you…
Make Time To Really Look & Listen
If you can’t figure out exactly why she’s freaking out right now, ask. Make time to really watch and listen to figure out ‘How can I be helpful?’. Often guys wait to be assigned a task, figuring if she needs something she’ll let me know. But, guys, we still appreciate when you take the time to notice we need help with something and do it.
Example: I abhor bringing in those darn groceries. When I come home from a $400 grocery shopping and am faced with bringing it all in, it’s nice when he comes out the door and grabs the bags without me asking. It’s even nicer, when he starts to put it away without even being asked! Bonus!
Get Those Kids Out, Now!
Nothing says “I love you” louder than removal of the kids for a few hours. Either taking the kids out for some fun, while she does her thing at home, or sending her off to get some peace and quiet (think mani/pedi break) before the holiday. My first year making Passover for the entire family and then some, my husband bought me a massage and then kicked me out to go use it. I was angry at first, that I had ‘so much to do’ but, once I had those knots out of my shoulders, I came home a much nicer person than I left.
Write Her a Note
In this era of virtual everything, the one thing you should never do virtually is Appreciation. This is the time to run out and buy a nice card that is blank inside. Why blank? Because you are about to fill that sucker up with your own words and nobody else’s. It doesn’t have to be mushy or even poetic – it just has to be you. Write why you still love that woman who slaved away to clean, prepare your meals and care for those little rugrats. Remind her why you still find her hot, even though she’s covered in cooked food and sweat. Relay those reasons you married her and how happy you are go be celebrating this holiday with her. Putting it on paper shows effort and allows her to open that card and reread at a later date ( and when she may not be so enamored with you)
Eye on the Prize
The point of all of this holiday madness is not the food, the new clothing or the clean house. The point is the celebration of your tradition and family. It is meant to be a time to enjoy each other and not create resentment.
If you find your wife is hating you, seems stressed at the mere mention of the P-word – stop, drop and help. Ask what you can do, ask your wife to make you a list of tasks if you’re totally clueless or just grab the kids and go to leave her time to breathe.
Holidays can become very stressful for everyone, and it’s a beautiful thing when 2 people who actually love each other focus on the prize.
So dear husbands, I hope I’ve clarified a bit of what we mean when we say ‘Show some appreciation!’ Now, go forth and act on it! Your reward will be forever undying love & appreciation in return – guaranteed – no money back!
Happy Passover. (or Happy Whatever-You-Are-Celebrating)
Wives All Over The World.